Back to Square One

Looks like we are back to square one. I received an e-mail early this morning from the orphanage that we applied to. Unfortunately, they have a long waiting list and thought that it might be faster if we looked for a different orphanage or agency to use for our adoption. Just what I wanted to see at 4am! NOT!!!

I am beginning to wonder if I am wanting this so very bad but that it is just not meant to be. Maybe GOD is trying to tell me something that I am too stubborn to accept. I don't know how something that feels so right can possible be wrong. (Oh wait, isn't that a song?)

I don't know what to do. I contacted one of the orphanages that the first one recommended, this is a Catholic orphanage. But to be honest, I don't have a lot of faith any more. I can't bear to give up, but it hurts so bad to go on and keep getting told "No".

Come on, God! I really need a sign.